Okay, so the title is cute. I get it.

I realize I'm a Kings fan, and this may not matter to any of you. I don't care as it doesn't keep from spouting off my nonsense in other places anyway.

So here goes. If you need to stop for a drink, I wouldn't blame you, or in the case of Turk, a diet coke.

Next year, the Cleveland Cavaliers have a 73 million and change committed in salary before options. (Which is one reason why I can understand why they are so hesitant despite the argument that Nate Jones made.)

However, that 73 million is only before options which means that the Cavs have some playing around room. Just as importantly for them (other than some guy named James), they will have a ton of cap space to play with in 2010. It's not likely to be 45 million dollars to play with, but if the Cavs don't resign Varejao, it could be somewhere near 35 million.

Let's rock this after the jump.

The Draft Part

Okay, there are only 3 ways to improve your team. Free Agency, Trades or the Draft. The Cavaliers have the 30th overall pick, and no 2nd round pick.

Will that 30th overall pick be a major asset? That's really the question. Would a team be willing to buy the pick? Would the Cavaliers be willing to sell it? Meh, who knows.

I would suggest Cleveland would be better off keeping the pick if a player they could get to back up Mo Williams is available. Patty Mills, who is playing at the Reebok Treviso camp in Italy this week, along with Ricky Rubio and Brandon Jennings, is a quick shoot first PG who can add depth to the PG.

Of the 11 players that are currently possibly under contract for next season, I can see 3 (Jawad Williams, Tarence Kinsey and Darnell Jackson) not returning. That leaves James, Ilgauskas, Williams, Gibson, Wallace, Hickson and West.

What the Cavs do with Szczerbiak, Pavlovic and Smith is anyone's guess. I would bet that of the 3, Joe Smith is more likely to return. But, that's me.

The LeBron bashing portion

I get that people here don't think it's a big deal he didn't shake hands. I do. I think it's disrespectful to players before him, and his teammates who had to cover for him. All it did was show he was a churlish brat. That interview he did with the Yankees hat on only makes that perception much easier to tag him with. Do I care? No, but anyone who wants to argue the guy is so obviously wonderful will have a more difficult time now. That's his fault.

This is similar to his insistence on not doing a slam dunk contest. He thinks it's beneath him. He makes his own rules. Okay, whatever. Just one more reason for me to ignore him. (Not that I'd buy anything LeBron sells anyway.)

Good now that's over.

The Trade propsoal that is bound to piss you off

The Shaq rumor is all the rage right now. And, the Shaq rumor is stupid. It makes little sense for a guy who can't defend anybody in the half court let alone the open court to become the open court Center. And, it's not like you can play him in a variety of ways either. He's going to park his fat 380 lbs ass 3 feet away from the hoop for however many minutes Mike Brown could play him. That means LeBron will have less room to operate inside consistently. Just ask Amare Stoudemire.

Which is why I present that loveable, Zach Randolph. I'm well aware of his warts. So, let's go through them.

He went to a strip club on the way to an airport after the Blazers told him it was okay to go to a family member's funeral. He punched Ruben Patterson in the face. (Actually, I happen to like that myself.) He got a DUI a few months ago. Still, probably not the best decision. Unless, you factor this in.

He's been traded twice in the last 2 years. He didn't fit in with New York, and now the Clippers would probably gladly move him out of the way for Blake Griffin.

So how in the world could a ball hog, fat, lazy, knucklehead punk like Zach Randolph ever help the Cavs?

Matchup. Problems.

He can do something that Shaq can't. He can hit jump shots. When he's right, he can't be stopped in the post. Yes, he's a black hole. Yes, he's an asshole. Yes, he hit Ruben Patterson in the face. (I list that as an asset. Can you tell I don't care for Patterson?) Yes, Brandon Roy got him traded and got Portland reamed in the process. (And Portland was glad to do it. When you have LaMarcus Aldridge, you can do that.) Yes, the Clippers traded for him because the Knicks had absolutely no use for him once D'Antoni got there.

Guess what? D'Antoni's teams don't require post presences. The Clippers are better off with Griffin at the 4. But, as good as Griffin is athletically in the open court, and in terms of actual hustle, he is better for them.

The Cavs still need a guy who can score in the low post. If you can get 20 points out of Zach Randolph vs the Magic, you beat them easily. It's a matchup they can't matchup with.  Yes, he would have to pass far better than he has out of double team's. Yes, he would have to come in with a good attitude and be committed to playing better defense.

Do you think he wouldn't mind that chance? You know, besides shaking hands, I hear LeBron James is a pretty good player. Zach Randolph will get paid  by some team next year. Cleveland should seriously think about acquiring him. Like anything it's a risk, and like anything, it could go wrong. You know, like Cleveland's championship banner being raised after winning 66 games during the regular season.

Nothing is guaranteed. Just ask the Seattle SuperSonics after they managed to be the 1st seed to lose to an eigth. (And, they lost in the 1st round in 1995 too. The Sonics won 63 games in 1994, and 57 games in 1995.)

Then they changed their player mix. Check out the difference between the roster's in 1995 and 1996. You wanna know why the Sonics made it out of the 1st round? Because the Kings were one of the worst, if not the worst, 8th seeds if you factored out the Clippers improbable run to the 8th seed in 1997 (with that mind boggling total of 35 no less). And, the Kings could have done it. Because Gary Payton wasn't anywhere near himself.

They changed the mix of their players. That's all I'm saying. They didn't need an extra star level player, but they needed the right mix of role players. (And not get upset in the 1st round.)

I think the deal the Cavs should look at is Zach Randolph for Daniel Gibson and Zydrunas Ilgauskas. (I would not give up Hickson or Wallace. They can both do things that Randolph won't ever do.)

Salary Cap Note: Due to Ilgauskas' player option (that he would be foolish to ignore), he can't be traded until after the July Moratorium.

If the idea that that the Cavs can get a better player I'd like to hear it. The Cavs have role players. The whole roster is filled with role players. Role players don't get All-Stars unless they have issue's. Zach Randolph has, and I suspect always will, have warts. No question.

But if Cleveland wants to contend, and let's just ignore the whether "he will stay or go" nonsense, like Guru said yesterday, they're going to need to figure out a way to complete their team. They have outside shooting, and they have role players who play defense. (If you ignore some of the shameful flopping that Anderson Varejao does. Which I blame the NBA for. Any player will do anything to gain an advantage at any time.) 

If Cleveland wants to make the opponents fear them more than they already do, they need something else. Zach Randolph is available. Is he ideal? No, if he was, he wouldn't be available.

Cleveland's biggest problems are, to my unreasonable eye, other than matchup issue's which they present for no one who is a legit championship contender, but as Adrian Wojnarowski pointed out, when Delonte West is posting up players and is probably your most reliable post up player, you got problems. The Cavs get a lot of points inside from LeBron James, and there's no doubt about that.

But, there needs to be better scoring options than Mo Williams. LeBron solves every real problem any franchise has from the get-go. (Other than the other stuff which happens.) But, to not take a risk because the fans will revolt is dumb.

Expiring contracts have so much value on the market. Like teams that want to dump players and not be stuck with the player coming back for too long. It's unwise to believe that Zydrunas Ilgauskas has much value on the market to other teams. He's very high paid, doesn't play great inside defense, and other than his offense, he doesn't bring much. But, he doesn't have a low post game. I know Cleveland fans love him, and there is a lot to like there, but at some point, being unemotional is the way to go. (This is what kills me about Kings fans with Mike Bibby. There are still some that want to swear it was a dumb trade. Fans, I swear.)

Either way, I've rambled on enough. Now, shoot me. If you even bothered to read all of this.