A Tongue-in-Cheek NBA Expansion Proposal

Well then, since LeBron has decided to go to play for the Dade County All-Stars, otherwise known as the Miami Heat, I - having entirely too much time on my hands - have come up with a perfect plan which would deny "the king" his ring (poetic, yes?) and would give pause to future free agents who would contemplate "pulling a LeBron".

And the answer is (without drawing out the suspense with water commercials...hey, I am wondering if a Massengill commercial would have been appropriate last night?  Just sayin'.  But I digress.)

The answer is to expand the NBA by two teams.

Okay, you ask, what good would that do?  Would it not further dilute the talent pool and make it easier for Miami to win?  Well, yeah, it would, unless my plan was implemented, which would be...

To take the best player from every team in each conference (Heat excluded) and combine them into two mega-expansion teams.  I mean, the Eastern Conference would have a roster of 14, and the West would have 15.  You could have Tayshaun Prince playing next to David Lee and Derrick Rose, could have Kobe teaming up with Kevin Durant...ah, the match-up possibilities are endless.

These teams would, of course, rule their conferences, with Miami likely being a close second in the East.  So how to handle the frustrations of fans in cities where there is no chance of winning anymore?  Hmmmm, wait,  I've got it  On a rotating basis over the course of 14 years (15 in the West) the expansion team would play all of their home games in one city per season.  For example, if we did it alphabetically, Atlanta would be the "home team" for the EC expansion team in its first season, with Dallas doing the honors in the West, and then, the next season, Boston would be "host" in the East and Denver in the West.  Etc, etc, yadda-yadda-yadda.

And of course, all fans in all cities would see the expansion teams at least two or three times every season when they played the actual hometown squad.

I suppose it would be kinda cool to give each team a name as well.  In the East it could be The Kingbreakers and in the West it could be the Dealshakers, or something clever and catchy like that (groans).

Of course, the fail-safe of my system would be, if the Heat somehow, due to injuries, whatever, made it out of the East, they would still have to face the Dealbreakers.  I think it is safe to say that, East or West, the expansion squads would have homecourt advantage, even if Miami went, say, 76-6.

Now you are looking at this and thinking I have lost it or am just being silly.  Maybe a little bit silly (maybe more than a little bit), but, truly, after that fiasco last night, which might, just might, be the first shot in the eventual demise of the NBA...

...How can anything else be any sillier?