Cleveland Cavaliers vs. Utah Jazz Final Score: Cavs rock Jazz, 113-102

Russ Isabella-USA TODAY Sports

The Cavs outwitted the Utah Jazz due to their superior understanding of chord structure and time signatures.

Winning. A strange feeling to denizens of Cleveland. As strange as the taste of a fresh-plucked kiwi, juices captivating your taste-buds and overwhelming your senses. Strange as a freshly slaughtered kangaroo, ripe koala meat, cooked over a charcoal grill, juices dripping from the fresh cut of succulent meat.

A Cleveland Cavaliers victory is more than just a victory in this day and age. It is a celebration. An induced exuberance like none other. No matter the circumstances, the sound of Fred McCleod sounding off on a Cavalier victory send the nerves a-fluttering and the spine a-shuttering.

And into the midst of our opium-induced revery charged Luol Deng. A bull of a man, his mere presence caused a chain reaction. From the game against Philadelphia to the blowout of these here Utah Jazz, the cacophony which the bringing in of Luol Deng has created quite the shift in fortunes. The winds once turned so Southerly, hath now been given thought to stay their haste, and mayhaps turn their intentions towards a more auspicious cause.

Deng rode in on a Ninetales, tails aflame in the glory if what was to come. And though the appearance was not perfect, the Ninetales did its duty, matching up excellent with grass types such as Richard Jefferson.

Kyrie Irving displayed his natural wont to score in the most ludicrous of ways, serving as a veritable Hitmonlee with a serious dose of Dire Hit. He never attacked the basket, but his mid-range game was on point.

In order to save time and space, I've decided to simply list the comparisons of players' performances to Pokemon.

Dion Waiters - Raichu

CJ Miles - Raichu

Tristan Thompson - Raichu

Anderson Varejao - Raichu

Tyler Zeller - Raichu

Jarrett Jack - Pikachu

Matthew Dellavedova - Raichu

Earl Clark - Pichu

Anthony Bennett - Snorlax

{Editor's note: This recap makes no sense but that's what we do here. The Cavs had some fantastic ball movement, knocked down shots, and Kyrie went bananas in the third quarter. They outscored the Jazz 39-21 in the 3rd quarter and never looked back. It was a really good all around performance and, despite the fact that the Jazz aren't very good, it was an encouraging sign. There seems to be some hope for this team and a game like this shows up what their potential upside might be. Luol Deng had a rough first half, committing some bad turnovers. But at the same time, you could see what he brings to the team. All of his cuts off the ball are purposeful and he has the ability to score from virtually anywhere on the court. It's a huge upgrade over the Cavs' other small forwards and it will be exciting to see what he can do with this team for the remainder of the road trip. The Cavs are now 3-15 on the road and will play the Sacramento Kings next.}

ROLL CALL

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