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Cleveland Cavaliers vs. Detroit Pistons Game Preview: Tanking With The Stars

-You see that guy? 


-Yeah, him. Break his ankles.
-You see that guy? -Him? -Yeah, him. Break his ankles.

This is an important game. You never thought I'd say that a game at the end of March between the Detroit Pistons and the Cleveland Cavaliers would be an important game, right? Well, you learn something new every time you read this blog (maybe?). I'm hoping that all of you have realized by now that this team is not gunning for that 8th playoff spot, but instead moving their way down the standings to get the best possible pick. That's why this is such an important game.

Song Of The Day: Free Fallin' - Tom Petty

Losers of three in a row and 7 of their last 8, the Cavaliers are free fallinnnnnnnnngggg.

Tonight's Overview:

Detroit Pistons (17-32) at Cleveland Cavaliers (17-30)

Here's why tonight's game is so crucial: if the Cavs lose tonight, they are tied with the Pistons for the 7th worst record in the league. The Pistons would own the tiebreaker over them, thus putting Cleveland in the 7th spot in the lottery. That would be a good thing. More ping pong balls = better chance at a better draft pick. So, I know there are some people who think it's an awful thing to root against your team and I kind of agree. I won't be throwing my Indians hat against the wall anytime Kyrie makes a shot, but I'll just say that it would be super convenient if the Cavs managed to play well, yet lose this game.

Despite the fact that losing this game certainly wouldn't be a bad thing, I'd also appreciate if the Cavs could manage to make me not want to stab my eyes with a pen while I'm watching it. Last night's effort against the Sixers was downright embarrassing and really just made me want to shoot things -- so I played Call of Duty for like, three hours afterwards. Can we get a solid performance from somebody tonight? How about Alonzo Gee? Or Tristan Thompson? Just somebody (NOT ANTHONY PARKER) do something that makes me smile tonight. Is that so much to ask?

What do you want to know about the Pistons? Here's something fun: Ben Gordon scored 45 points in a game last week. On Monday against the Wizards, Ben Gordon scored zero points. Which Ben Gordon will we get tonight? Well if Anthony Parker is guarding him, it's probably going to be closer to the 45 points version. Tune in to find out!

I wrote in last game's recap that Kyrie's shooting percentage over the past 10 games has been down around 42% as opposed to his normal 47-48%. If he has another poor shooting performance tonight, I give you permission to panic (don't actually panic, the kid is 20 years old. How consistent were you when you were 20 years old?). It's just something to keep an eye on.

Key Matchup:

Tristan Thompson vs. Greg Monroe

On one hand, you've got the technically sound Greg Monroe. On the other hand, you've got the incredibly raw, freak athlete. Which will win? Well, it's probably going to be Monroe because he's simply a much better player at this point. However, this is another one of those match ups that could be very beneficial to Tigger's development as a post defender. He needs to be disciplined and not bite on Monroe's fakes and rely on his athleticism to play defense. Athleticism is good, but he needs to be able to harness it to become a really good defender. Meanwhile, Monroe is a pretty subpar defender, so Tristan should be able to score a decent amount tonight.

Fear The Sword's Fearless Prediction:

I have no idea what to expect. I feel like the Byron Scott is going to light a fire under their asses and get them ready to win a winnable game. I'm not sure though. Anyway, I don't usually think very hard about these predictions and usually just make something up. Therefore, Cavs win 109-101.