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With the two teams most prone to employment of Gana Diop meeting on the deserted hardwood of The Gana Diop Memorial Arena in Charlotte, NC, it seems fitting that we start off by reminding the world that we are, in fact, down with the Pee Pants.
I want candy, bubble gum, and taffySkip to the sweet shop with my sweetheart SandyGot my pennies saved so I'm her sugar daddyI'm her Hume Cronyn and she's my Jessica Tandy, I want candy!put it in a pile, split it with my bitty 50/50 down the linekinda like close encounters of the cavity kindim talkin liquorice kisses, talkin chocodile smilesI want candy, i got a sugar toothput on your shin gaurds, Sandy, 'cause i wanna knock bootslick my peppermint stick til' the lollipop droopsgumdrop that dont stop til' its licked knot loose(ladies)candy... candy...i need candy bubble gum, and taffyget in my way punk, you're gonna get ya ass beat, nastyDo it till your dad sees, embarass your whole familyJust 'cause you came between a kid and his candyI need candy, any kind'll doDon't care if it's nutritious or "FDA approved"It's gonna make me spaz like bobcats on boozeA hyperactive juice that only I can produceAnd fuel a giant drill, bore straight into HellReleasing ancient demons from their sleep forever spellSo they can walk upon the earth, and get resituatedAnd Hock the diet pills that MC Pee Pants has createdI need candy, want some candy, eat candy til' I'm deadI'll kill you for some candy, give me candy, candy head!Where you keepin' all the candy?!Who made you candy king?!If you dont give me some candy, I will make the ladies sing!(ladies)Candy, in tha morning, candy on the way to schoolCandy, at school, at lunch in the afternoonCandy, in school, on your way home from schoolCandy, at diner,at dinner, in bed!Mess up the mix, mix up the messCome on down yo, here's the addressAt 6-1-2 Wharf Avenue,Right next to, gentlemen's club.-MC Pee Pants (M.C. Chris - Aired on Aqua Teen Hunger Force)
That song has always reminded me of Gana Diop. Constantly searching out and locating Candy (in this case many many millions of Diop Dollars), and building a giant drill to drill the Cavs of his era straight to hell. If only he would have located the diet pills and a hook shot.
Not every day starts awesome though, as a Fear The Sword regular commenter let me know that he passed over Kyrie Irving in favor of Steph Curry of the Golden State Warriors.
<blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p><a href="https://twitter.com/MegatonHookjaw">@MegatonHookjaw</a> Curry is booty son. That is not the pick that Ben Affleck would have made.</p>— Ryan Mourton (@Ryan_Mourton) <a href="https://twitter.com/Ryan_Mourton/statuses/393446355563077632">October 24, 2013</a></blockquote>
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Now look. Curry is a nice player, but I'm a born hater. This is the internet bro, if Kyrie isn't the best at something for the team I like then it looks like I don't even lift.
David Zavac, after being accused of being an illuminati, calmly explains that he was a Pistons fan until the Cavs beat them in the playoffs, and now he is a Cavs fan.
<blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p><a href="https://twitter.com/EdTheRevelator">@EdTheRevelator</a> because I started as a Pistons fan, like the Tigers but can't completely buy in because of Cardinals reasons, and most of my</p>— David Zavac (@DavidZavac) <a href="https://twitter.com/DavidZavac/statuses/393455805837484032">October 24, 2013</a></blockquote>
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To amp up for the game, we looked at some of the old school things the Cavs used to do in Mike Brown's first go around <blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p><a href="https://twitter.com/search?q=%23nofilter&src=hash">#nofilter</a> <a href="http://t.co/bYdgAGjeXC">pic.twitter.com/bYdgAGjeXC</a></p>— BraveMufasa (@teamrobhogg) <a href="https://twitter.com/teamrobhogg/statuses/393479368686575616">October 24, 2013</a></blockquote>
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Keeping with that image, Anthony Bennett was checking fools from the very beginning
<blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p>Bennett has 3 fouls in 5 minutes</p>— David Zavac (@DavidZavac) <a href="https://twitter.com/DavidZavac/statuses/393523194318954496">October 24, 2013</a></blockquote>
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Seriously though, Brandon Jennings can't shoot.
<blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p>Hilarious that people are saying Detroit wouldn't want Rondo because he can't shoot. Have you looked at Jennings' percentages?</p>— Nate Jones (@JonesOnTheNBA) <a href="https://twitter.com/JonesOnTheNBA/statuses/393519685494255616">October 24, 2013</a></blockquote>
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Seriously, kill me now
<blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p>LeBron,Greg Oden,and Norris Cole Photo Opp - NBA superstar LeBron James may have left the Cleveland Cavaliers... <a href="http://t.co/OnADCUKQqT">http://t.co/OnADCUKQqT</a></p>— EVES LOUNGE (@EvesLounge1) <a href="https://twitter.com/EvesLounge1/statuses/393566556216889344">October 25, 2013</a></blockquote>
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<blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p>If the Tribe had more beards they'd be in the World Series right now.</p>— WayneEmbrysKids (@WayneEmbrysKids) <a href="https://twitter.com/WayneEmbrysKids/statuses/393571980944744448">October 25, 2013</a></blockquote>
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This is one of those fancy Saber... sabre.... this is some advanced statisticery
<blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p>When kyrie and bynum step on the court. Cavs are actually a decent team</p>— Jake Smith (@jakesmithND) <a href="https://twitter.com/jakesmithND/statuses/393571931854614528">October 25, 2013</a></blockquote>
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I canceled my ticket for SSAC, this is all I need.
So first I thought this was a hilarious metaphor for the LeBron era Cavs, but this is an actual thing
<blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p>NBA Cleveland Cavaliers Deluxe Folding Chair <a href="http://t.co/sG7DzTCufr">http://t.co/sG7DzTCufr</a></p>— Dorotha Bulloch (@Dorotha_Bulloch) <a href="https://twitter.com/Dorotha_Bulloch/statuses/393572047114092545">October 25, 2013</a></blockquote>
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So to finish this, I thought it would be a fitting send off to our dear friend Gana Diop to find some tweets about him. Well..... they don't really exist. There is a chance that he is just an elaborate government scheme to ruin Cavs basketball for a half decade. I dunno. I found one though
<blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p>RT <a href="https://twitter.com/realcavsfans">@realcavsfans</a>: .<a href="https://twitter.com/PDcavsinsider">@PDcavsinsider</a> What's Diop doing? / Getting ready to pack his bags? Aw, that was mean, I know. - JV</p>— M.S. Boyer/J. Valade (@PDcavsinsider) <a href="https://twitter.com/PDcavsinsider/statuses/393521374729605120">October 24, 2013</a></blockquote>
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So yeah. we're rolling out, back to the Q, back to the Q, booing Garnett is what we'll do. Got my signs made up, my troll game is tight, hope I don't get in a fight.
ALL ABOARD<blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p>Anthony Bennett struggle bus</p>— David Zavac (@DavidZavac) <a href="https://twitter.com/DavidZavac/statuses/393522038477819904">October 24, 2013</a></blockquote>
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